Bada boom bada bing,
So my wife and I love to spend time together. We do it a lot. I would rather be sitting around doing nothing with her, than whatever you do to have fun with your family I believe. Maybe I'm over reaching there, but you know what I mean. When she is off we hang out together, sometimes just watching TV, sometimes just in the house, but for the very high percentage of the time we are just hanging out, eating, getting along and relaxing. Someone told me yesterday that I was freaking weird. Like why would you want to spend your free time with "her". Full disclosure, they don't know my wife. Even fuller disclosure, they've never been to my house. It wasn't hard to explain, but I did have a good time ragging him about the nagging marathon he has endured because of the quarantine.
It left me wondering about all the people who think like this and who are married or partnered with folks they don't want to be alone with or spend free time with. Makes me sad really. We are thinking about taking a one tank trip this weekend, just driving somewhere and then driving back listening to one of our audible books we have on her phone. That's our favorite travel hobby.
Anyway, on to the next great thing.
You know how everybody is always hating on celebrities for being a bunch of clueless dipshits? Same thing you hear with people that hate on athletes, rich business people, rich politicians etc. They don't buy anything for themselves and before you know it Brittany or Paris have shown the world their vajayjays or someone has video of them banging a groupie or doing drugs off the crack in a strippers butt. Next thing you know, they have Tiger Blood in their DNA and big bucks are being paid to exclusive PR firms to try to do damage control.
It hardly ever works, and they only stop doing the destructive behavior once they have taken the required beating to their potential to earn money. Some people like for example, Pamela Anderson, Lindsay Lohan or Maitland Ward can't be saved from their own stupidity and they would have made the sex tapes for someone else to make a shit ton of money no matter what happened. Others might have benefitted from some real advice, like for example if their advisers had told them repeatedly to not show the whole world your private parts, including the ridges of your butthole (Kim Kardashian). They may have still made the tape , but they might have hired a professional film director and a lighting crew to make it have professional cinematography and correct camera techniques. And they might have done a better job at controlling the royalty payments.
You know what they were missing in every single case? Every single one of these incidents, from public drunkenness to sex tapes to drug use to bashing car windows with golf clubs (Mrs. Woods?) would have benefitted from having somebody stuck to their side for the first 4 or 5 years of their "celebrityhood" teaching them how to be a normal person making normal decisions. I would call it being a professional friend, someone picked for their ability to see the long term impacts of their dumbness, should it be allowed to fester. Some only need to test out of the class, like say Michael Jordan, although he should have taken the one called "No excessive gambling on your public Image dumbass, some would be required to take the whole 5 years before they could graduate, like say Charlie Sheen. These people would have control of the money decisions and it would be built into their contracts.
All it would take is for this to be an edict of the greedy ass Insurance industry. Those folks make decisions about all of us, on every other subject, so I really don't see how this would be any different. The problem would be vetting the professional friends. No ego and no greed would be a requirement and that is what maybe kills the idea right there. Cool thought though. I would apply for the job, and telling some rich ass idiot "NO you cannot go to Vegas , have sex with animals and 14 year olds and then go back to preaching to the world on Sunday, dumbass!" Or some version of that.
I know - Fantasy island. HA!!
Here are 5 things that you may find odd
- The California law that required a completed background check in order to buy ammunition has been declared unconstitutional by a Federal Judge. Duh. The same judge here also struck down the state's law against high capacity magazines for the same reason. Read about it at the link below. I would just be saying the same things they have already published. You can also search for it on the internet if you would rather the source material come from somewhere else, but the stories are all essentially the same. Google is your friend.
Federal Judge declares law unconstitutional - Click to read - Iran has summoned the Swiss ambassador for talks after Trump said on twitter "To Blow any ship out of the water that harrasses US warships (sic)." The Swiss represent American interests because we have no direct contact with the Iranians. They are the go to third party that talks to countries we don't formally recognize or have direct talks with. They have threatened to "...destroy any warship that threatens their defensive capabilities." Riiigghhtt. This is called posturing boys and girls.
Sounds good on paper. Except they have mostly smaller vessels and could not compete with a modern navy. I have no doubt that if they were to attack an Aircraft carrier, the attacking vessel would not last very long. The conflict would mostly be over before it started. I would not want to be standing on the deck of an Iranian ship of any kind if one of them decided to fire a shot in anger at a US warship, as that would be ugly. And the sea would be very oily. And probably very fiery. And full of Iranian sailor body parts.
Iranian Navy description - Click to Read - So, maybe despotic dumbass Kim Jong Un isn't ill after all who knows. Thay now say he might have taken a beach vacation because everyone around him was testing positive for the coronavirus. You never know what to believe from these people.
- I am going to be as happy as anyone when this Covid-19 stuff is over. I don't know how they are going to open the movie theatres back up or if they will because of the costs involved, but there are a few movies my wife and I really want to see that are in upcoming release like Wonder Woman 1984 , Venom 2- Let there be carnage, No Time to Die among the host of others. I think there are a couple of MCU movies in there somewhere too, but I'm not so sure about those. We just miss the movies, among other things. I still don't miss that crap called Pico de Gallo sauce though.
- I found a list of facts that sound like they are fake but they are actually real. I think this was on buzzfeed but I'm not sure. Google is your friend, Look it up , there was over one hundred of them.
- There is not a single bridge across the Amazon River
- The shortest distance between Russia and the US is 4 km
- Pocahontas and Shakespeare lived at the same time
- 1 Horse = 15 HorsePower (no kidding)
- (1) 10 inch Pizza has more pizza than (2) 7 inch Pizzas do. Weird
- In 3 or 4 generations you will be totally forgotten unless you did something special or killed a lot of people
- Technically speaking, Antarctica is a desert (because of low rainfall totals)
- and last Did you know that an Octopus has Blue Blood?
Yesterday ? Fuhgeddaboutit!!,
BigMike
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