The Preamble to the Constitution

WE THE PEOPLE of the United States, in Order to form a more perfect Union, establish Justice, insure domestic Tranquility, provide for the common defence, promote the general Welfare, and secure the Blessings of Liberty to ourselves and our Posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the United States of America.

Wednesday, May 13, 2020

Good Afternoon, I'm coach O'Hara

Wednesday, 05/13/2020 at just spot on 6:00 a.m.

Hello good morning, have some coffee, sit back and relax, sashay yourself to the living room,

My wife is a wonderful person. I learn from her examples almost every day. I don't know how she puts up with me, but I'm sure glad she does. She said its because she loves me. I'm so goofy sometimes and aggravate her so much I am reminded that Lizzie Borden probably loved her family too. Everybody has a breaking point. Yesterday I insulted her sort of accidentally while I was messing with her , aggravating her on purpose. She got highly offended and for the life of me sitting here at this computer, right now, I cannot remember what I said nor what exactly I did. I know it was something pretty stupid, but isn't it weird how I can't brain my brain to the moment in time and brain my brain to come up with what I said or did? I'm sorry honey. I'm an idiot. Whatever it was.

Oh and she sews too. She was just playing around with some cloth and some elastic and popped out a couple of face masks or three for the whole family if we needed to go out, just in case. Mine fit perfect even though it is tough to breathe in any of those damn things. You suck air in and feel suffocated and when you exhale you fog your glasses so bad you can't see. That is just how they work, but the masks are great. Thankx honey. My buddy John Hall's wife Penny is the same way. She can just take a hunk of cloth and fiddle with it in her seamstress way and pop! Next thing you know poof!! Here's a pillow cover or a cushion cover or an apron. It's amazing to me. I mean I can do that with wood, but nobody would ever sleep on a wooden pillow.

I tried out for wrestling once in the 7th grade when we lived in Great Falls Montana. I didn't have a clue what wrestling was about and had seen no matches nor had I ever saw it on TV or anything else. I just wanted to what the sport was all about and the cheerleaders for wrestling were pretty hot so off I went to tryouts.

The tryouts were held in the gym in the same place where we had PE class, only the mats that usually hung on the wall behind the basketball goals were now on the floor, There was probably about 30-40 kids there who wanted to wrestle. It looked like about 1/3 of us knew what was going on and the other 2/3rds of the tryouts were totally clueless as to what happens next. We were standing around sorta mumbling and this chiseled muscular-looking walking pyramid of a man came through the doors at the end of the gym. He had a coach look about him and had a whistle around his neck. He had a head that looked bolted onto his shoulders, he didn't really have a neck, his torso was a big V and it appears as if his legs were made of rock. Later on, I found out he served as a politician in Montana, and the second semester of that year he was also my PE teacher.
His name was Jesse O'Hara and apparently he was some sort of wrestling legend in this part of the world. Someone told me later that he was the Montana State champion in his weight class or some such, but as for me, I had no clue. He looked like he was in charge and acted like he was in charge and everyone automatically settled down and shut up as he walked to the center of our gathering. He didn't say much, this ain't one of these "Oh he's going to inspire us with a wonderful speech on wrestling" or a some sort of  humble brag about who he was or anything else. He just blew the whistle and said very plainly "Good Afternoon, I'm coach O'Hara." That was it and the room went totally silent.

Next he just explained he was going to be evaluating us today for our suitability to be wrestlers for the "Grizzlies" as our team was called in our brand new, just opened up middle school. He pointed at me and another kid about my size and said "You two, upfront". Not knowing what was happening I just ambled up to the front of him and next to me (I'll never forget) was this pimple-faced scared-looking kid that was wearing glasses and a gym outfit that was about to fall off of him. Coach O'Hara said something to the effect of "We are going to see what you two can do in 2 minutes", and he blew the whistle. Neither one of us moved because as I was to find out later, he was too scared and I was clueless and had no idea what to do next. After a few seconds the coach blew the whistle again and said "Do you guys know why you're here?", and see right here I just want to insert a Men in Black movie quote or something like "Because you're looking for the best of the best of the best sir", but that movie hasn't been made yet at this point so the other guy just says "Uh, to wrestle?" Coach smiles and says "Rigghhttt, so get to it , when I blow the whistle again, you wrestle, understand?"

Ok, I get it, he wants us to show him our moves! Of course. I totally understand and when he blew the whistle again, I moved in and reached over and slapped this kid on his chest with my forearm as hard as I could, got around behind him, grabbed him around the waist and while pressed up against him, slammed him back into the prettiest flying suplex you ever saw! I was feeling pretty good about myself when I found myself flying across the mat and the whistle was blowing like mad and coaches face was like an inch from mine and he is yelling at the top of his lungs "WHAT IN THE NAME OF (whatever he said), WAS THAT?"

Uh, ... Army training sir!! That's a fact Jack! No wait that movie hasn't been made yet either. I was confused, so I just meekly replied "Um wrestling?" The other kid wasn't saying anything at this point because I had knocked the breath out of him, scared him so bad he was crying and he was pissed off, you could just see it on his face. The coach was right in my face and man was he pissed off. He went on about how what.... I was doing was that TV show fake crap and nobody who really wrestles would ever do anything like that and did I think I was funny and was I trying to hurt this young man and so on and so forth until he finally came up for breath and said: "So Dummy before I kick your butt out of here, what do you have to say for yourself?".

First, you should have seen the faces and the laughter on virtually every other face in the gym. Second, my Dad yelled louder than Coach and he wasn't beating my ass so I didn't react to the screaming that much which sort of made it worse in a weird way, and Third, DUDE !! Man was I in trouble, I mean I understood that much, what I wasn't clear on was the why? I mean didn't he just say to show him what we had and for us to wrestle? I said something quickly trying to somehow extricate myself from this mess like, "Um, Coach, I know exactly zero about wrestling, I just did the only thing I have ever seen even called wrestling and its what my brothers did to me all the time when we wrestled in the back yard and said I'm sorry If I did something wrong but I really do not get why you're so pissed because I just did what you told me to do. Before today I had never seen anything BUT TV wrestling." He just looked at me dumbfounded, speechless and silently for about, oh about 15 seconds. Then while he explained to the rest of the people that were there to try out what Olympic style wrestling was about, I ran laps around the gym for the rest of the session. I finally did try out for the team and did wrestle one year, but that first day was a doozy!

Please put your tray tables up and in their stored position. No smoking in the bathroom.

  1. My wife said whenever the new Soprano's movie comes out, we are getting HBO back no matter what. I mumbled Yes dear because she was still pissed off at my stupidity, go figure.
  2. Clarence Thomas, Supreme Court Justice has been calling for a shrinking of the first amendment for quite some time and now it is making news again. He says the court should reconsider its overbreadth doctrine which basically says there has to be a very compelling reason why free speech isn't considered inviolate, meaning not available for review. He has long held the opinion that children and teenagers have no first amendment rights to free speech at all. He says their rights or exclusion of them are totally controlled by their parents, not the courts until they are legal adults. Unless of course you are a corporation or you are a rich political donor then you have all the protection that a right-wing justice can allow.
  3. Every time I see a doctor on TV, he is wearing a long white coat and has a stethoscope slung around his neck. I don't actually know if this is real or not but even in commercials where they sit behind a desk, a long white coat and stethoscope draped around his neck. Sometimes my wife talks with me about stuff like that, and she will casually mention a lot of times the doctor wants to borrow her scope because he doesn't have his with him. Weird.
  4. I wonder who is going to replace Alex Trebek on Jeopardy when he either dies or retires whichever comes first? I mean the guy has pancreatic cancer, has a contract that runs through 2022, and is currently 79 years old. Some people say they think it will be Ken Jennings and others think a woman is going to replace him. I have no idea, I was just thinking about it.
  5. Now it's getting real. Vladimir Putin's' spokesman has come down with and has contracted Covid-19, after news that cases have spiked in Russia. I wonder if this guy will live to see treatment?

    How dare he endanger the boss.
    I understand they have a fine lead cure for Covid-19 in Russia.

    BigMike

1 comment:

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