The Preamble to the Constitution

WE THE PEOPLE of the United States, in Order to form a more perfect Union, establish Justice, insure domestic Tranquility, provide for the common defence, promote the general Welfare, and secure the Blessings of Liberty to ourselves and our Posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the United States of America.

Monday, December 22, 2008

How can I help you?

 
How can I help you? You ever hear these words in a restaurant or C-Store? You walk up to the counter or you sit down in the restaurant or call someplace and the first thing they say to you is "....How can I help you?" Then, in the flash of an eye, you get put on hold or interrupted or told "I don't handle that". Next !

Wait a minute, did you want to help me or not? I haven't even finished explaining to you what it is I want yet and already you are yelling next ! Give a me the common courtesy of you undivided attention and try to figure out how to help me solve my friggin problem !

Why do people say things like this anyhow? It means no more than the usual "How are you?" greeting that you get from most folks when you first see them. If you answer this phrase as it is asked, they look at you like you just ran over their foot with their car. They don't really want to know, they just want to hear you say fine. Irks me to no end. You don't want to know , don't ask.

Here's another one. There are about 300 million people in the USA (estimate). Most of those people are born here, educated here, work here, vacation here, retire here and die here. Almost all of them speak English (in varying degrees). Yet, when you call some place, the automated menu says "To continue in English, press one". Like I need to know what language to speak in , in my own country?

I am not insensitive to non-English speakers. Whenever I can I try to learn conversational phrases in the language of the area in order to be able to communicate in the language of the people around me, or I take somebody who can translate for me. Why on gods earth then do I need the phone company to ask me if I want to continue in English?

Assume I want English, I live in America, ask If I want to communicate in another language. "To continue in Espanola, press dos". Seems pretty ignorant to ask the high 99 % majority of the people who call if they want to communicate in the predominate language in the country you are in. If I was in Japan, I wouldn't expect for the voice prompt to say, to continue in Japanese, press one, I would expect the message to be in Japanese, because I am in JAPAN !!! - duh!

You ask me , we have went too far to the left in our cultural sensitivity.

Oh I'm sorry, you don't speak English or you are deaf, don't worry, I'll talk louder !

Here is another stupid decision, where we are busy trying to be all things to all people and never to risk offending anyone with our products, goods or services.

I'll bet almost everyone in America has used a drive thru ATM. Most people have used them more than the inside of the bank. I am sure there is a segment in America who has never used anything but an ATM. The access to the keypad is designed so that you can use it from your car. The drivers side of the car is usually the side you transact your business from.

If all of that is true, then why pray tell are there Braille indicators on the keypads at a drive thru ATM? Who is ever going to use that particular function anyhow? Is this designed for the legally blind yet totally functional driver who will occasionally need to go to the ATM late one night who does not want to get out of the car because the seeing eye dog is afraid of the dark?

What the heck is this all about anyhow?

How did we become such a society of idiots anyhow?
 
Thankx for reading my rant ! 
 
bigmike
 
Visit my blog online at http://bigmikerant.blogspot.com/  
 
I encourage you to leave your own comments or reactions to my rants (even if you don't agree with me) in the comments section on each post.
 

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Simple things that are just stupid

I saw this sign above the doorway of a Flying J travel plaza.

The question it brings to mind is almost too simple to ask.

Who in their right mind thinks the cashier at a truck stop, knows more about Homeland Security threat levels than the average person does?

To me , this is just another one of those idiosynchratic messages we see all the time that nobody pays attention to, except maybe lawyers.

The message on matches that says " Warning, when struck against the attached rough surface, may cause flame", is about the same , maybe the same category at least. The message on peanuts that says "May contain nuts", (no kidding saw that one at a McDonalds, in happy meal stuff.

What exactly is the message here?

Just what is it they are trying to say?

Maybe the message is "Oxymorons unite !

FYI : An Oxymoron is a combination of contradictory or incongruous words, such as 'Cruel Kindness' or 'Jumbo Shrimp' (Jumbo means 'large' while Shrimp means 'small'). It is a literary figure of speech in which opposite or contradictory words, terms, phrases or ideas are combined to create a rhetorical effect by paradoxical means.

Try this : http://www.oxymoronix.com/

Some of my favorites are:

  1. Military Intelligence

  2. Unbiased Opinion

  3. Microsoft Works

  4. Exact Estimate

  5. Virtual reality

Seems to me they over thought this.

They should have just put it on a T-Shirt (or a sign).



Thanks for reading my Rant !

-bigmike
http://bigmikerant.blogspot.com/




Monday, December 1, 2008

Life is really just 2 questions



Life is really just 2 questions...





Should I get a dog.....?













OR



Should I have children?







Thankx for reading my rant !




bigmike




Visit my blog online at http://bigmikerant.blogspot.com/




I encourage you to leave your own comments or reactions to my rants (even if you don't agree with me) in the comments section on each post.